One of the worst people I want is the tardiness. The other I love to be tardy because I can rant more and more of them, and also lead me to stop talking and sit them, get out and leave that late planted I really like, what can I do. I take terrible when friends do, of course, because I do not like these leave or put them planted green. You can imagine that I am a British punctuality. It is rare that late, on the contrary, I always try to arrive before the scheduled time, but I just started to walk around the neighborhood looking at the new arrivals. Because yes, I hate being late anywhere but I do not like to be the first. For me always come last, when they are all invited, but of course can not be because if it did always come late and is not in my nature. You know, is like the scorpion, I can not as I can not no more to say. I despair latecomers. And I untie the tongue fine thing are latecomers to the movies. In the theater will not let them go once it has begun the role gives me exactly the same, but in the cinema ... how I hate those who arrive when they are putting the trailers and are dedicated to go rubbing your ass on the knees of the entire row as they go spouting popcorn everywhere and repeated "sorry" in the same tone used by grandmothers to the litany of rosary.
Well, the truth is that I have to admit that I am very cranky film and many things bother me, not only latecomers. For example, neither the popcorn stand. I never understood what personnel moves to kneel those giant buckets of popcorn saltier than the sea, and passed the film sipping a Coke tank where I could swim a duck. Especially in the session of the four or five in the afternoon, when most people in this country are in full digestion. How could anyone inflate empapuzar all that popcorn and coca-cola? And sweets, many are not satisfied with the bucket of corn and also bought a bag of jelly beans, licorice, clouds, or know much of the rev sugar.
To me, if these pleasures were silent, not provoke me beyond surprised to see a fairly mature adult get it in the body. But no, this is crap sound producing noise pollution of all kinds, from the noise of grinding wheels popcorn (we will not discuss the kikos and potatoes, which pissed me) to the people who spend the film scratching the bucket with nails every time you take a Fist of popcorn, or those who choose the candy wrapped in cellophane world crisper. Of course, for my taste the most pigs are sipping coca-cola-rrrrrrrrppp slurrrrrp doing.
I do not like those who speak in the film. I do not mind the comments before the movie, on the contrary, I find it hilarious to hear people, but once it starts I can not bear to talk anyone. And that you hear things descojonantes, I still remember when he left Quevedo in "Alatriste" and adolescents who had sat next to me said, "Go, look, Becquer. The laughter I came in spurts, that JB did not understand why he's so funny to see that scene. Or when he finished "The Name of the Rose" and the girl in the back row said: "aaaah ... I understand .... the girl should call Rose ... so well have titled the film. " Hala, another round of laughter. Which made me not a shred of grace were some Japanese who agreed with me watching "The Last Samurai." We alone in the film the two of them and me, and one of them did not speak English, the other film he translated it entirely into Japanese. Touch your balls, manolito, toooooda the film directly between Japan in the same tone as if they were at home and without a hair cut. Fortunately they had broken the unwritten rules of behavior that says that if you enter a movie theater you have to sit right next to those who have gone before. Aaaaaah, feel, although you have all the room you can not choose to leave rows or seats to accommodate you through, you have to apegotonar with those who have come before you. It is similar to what they do sheep in the mountains, that you let loose and are scattered rather than always en rebaño. Claro que lo de las ovejas (y las cebras, y los ñúes) lo entiendo, que lo hacen para defenderse de los depredadores pero en una sala de cine me contarán ustedes qué depredadores nos van a atacar.
Aun así, con todas esas manías, me gusta el cine; más que gustarme me encanta, y JB y yo aprovechamos que en el pueblo hay 16 salas para escaparnos entre semana a media tarde, que no suele haber nadie. Y cuando digo nadie me refiero a que literalmente no suele haber nadie; que más de una vez hemos estado solos no ya en la sala sino en todo el complejo de los cines. Y eso que se trata de un circuito comercial a tope, que cuando han puesto los ciclos de cine en versión original o de ópera ni les story. Of course, that things happen that happens, as the other afternoon, we climb to see movie joins accompanied by Madagascar, which had finished their homework. We entered and there was nobody, so we chose the more centraditas seats, and just when we thought we were going to turn the lights came a couple of venerable little old gentlemen. The grandparents took a look, they saw us, and instead of seeking a comfortable place turned to climb all the steps that are required to sit right in the front row of ours. It took the strip, of course, that the man had even a cane. And when they were seated she says, "Oh, I would have to urinate, which if not I will not watch the movie at home." And this is said four times, each time raising the voice over for their holy not hear. In the end, when the man had heard (not to learn) the woman added: "I do not know if I will give me time." We calculate mentally what was soon to descend the steps, removed to relieve the petticoats, petticoats put back in, up the stairs again ... PSE film half or so. The woman, who should be doing the same calculation, torn between whether to leave or not, when suddenly he heard a deep voice filled the room: "Go to pee in peace, madame, that hope, if it is necessary to put the two trailers times that no time for everything ". We were all quiet printing. "Is God," she asked with laughter Madagascar. "At this point I would say yes," said JB serious. "Well, I like to waste time," he said laughing Madagascar could be. "Notice that I thought those were soundproof booths" I said surprised. The woman began to look up all around, not knowing who or where to give thanks, and went downstairs, followed by the voice of the husband, who wondered out loud who had said something and what she said. And yes, there was time tó pa, and saw more trailers than ever.
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